anatomy

I learned some anatomy today.


What happens in your stomach when you mess up:

The hot acid of guilt bubbles up

Into the pit of your stomach 

And makes it 

Dance.

.

It twists and turns in a waltz and

Steps on toes and

Loses count and

Tumbles.


What happens in your chest when you realize you’ve fallen out of love:

That tight feeling 

Is actually

The rope you’d been 

Weaving

The whole time 

.

Except all of a sudden

There are all these knots and

The more you try to unravel them

The tighter they get 

Until

.

Ouch.

.

And the rope breaks.

And the love seeps out of the frayed ends.


What happens at the back of your neck when someone you love hurts you:

The hairs on the back of your neck

Become the spines of a cactus

And all of a sudden you’re in the desert 

.

But you’re cold.

.

And the hot desert sun hits your eyes and they 

Water

And water

And don’t stop

Until they’ve run out.


Why your hands get clammy when you’re holding someone else’s:

Your hands don’t understand 

That the sweat leaving them 

Isn’t glue enough to

Hold them together.

.

But they try

Because what’s the harm

In a couple of clammy hands

Doing their best?


That ball in your throat when you’re trying not to cry:

It’s filled with all the things that went wrong

Surrounded by all the reasons not to break

And dammed by a wall of frail fear that

Is slowly chipped away as

The ball does its best to squeeze its way out.


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